Make Me Do a Double Take

Well, in my not so short time on this planet, I’ve heard (and said) some really questionable things, so in honour of that sentiment here are some lyrics that have made me do a double take…

  1. Would you risk it for a chocolate biscuit? – Frisky by Tinie Tempah. Dude seriously?! I won’t get frisky for a chocolate biscuit, I don’t care if that biscuit was dipped in the chocolatey goodness of Keith David’s voice. It ain’t happening, bruv. Oh and asking twice is not going to change the outcome.
  2. I lie awake, I’ve come to ground, I’m watching porn in my hotel dressing gown. – Destiny by Zero 7 ft. Sia. Yup, that’s how the song starts. I guess they were trying to set the tone.
  3. I came so hard from your mouth, I saw the future, it was dark – The Future by Austra. Wow, the lady appears to have skills. If someone ever tells you this, pat yourself on the back, then seek help since it appears your future might be bleak. Apparently, the future isn’t bright and/or orange. Remember to use your powers for good.
  4. I’ll fix your smashed up head. – You Know Where to Find Me by Imogen Heap. Wait what?! What the heck? I don’t recall the guy’s head being smashed anywhere in the song. When did the attack happen? Did you do the attacking?
  5. Goodnight and Go by Imogen Heap. The song really is about her stalking a guy. Look, the song sounded cheery enough, you know a woman suffering from a crush/unrequited love from an oblivious man, then the second verse happens…

Follow you home, you’ve got your headphones on and you’re dancing

Got lucky, beautiful shot you taking everything off watch the curtains wide open

Then you fall in the same routine flicking through the TV relaxed and reclining

And you think you’re alone…

Yup, that lost its cuteness real quick…

I know I could have filled this list with any random rap song, any popular Nigerian song or whatever weird stuff comes out from Kanye West’s or Lil’ Wayne’s mouth, I could have even attempted to translate Chief Keef’s mumble…but, where’s the fun in that?





Nice to know I can still write random content, and yes the title is from Missy Eliott’s Lose Control. Yes, I still use random lyrics as titles…Now maybe I’ll finally update my gaming blog.

Yoga – Janelle Monáe ft. Jidenna

Ah…the Electric Lady is back, the only person whose concert I’ve ever attended. One of the two people I’ll willingly spend money to buy their music – the other is Imogen Heap, although that list may soon grow to four with Melanie Fiona & Jazmine Sullivan, but I digress.

Anywho, she’s back with a brand new song and it’s very different to her usual music…yes folks it would appear that she’s made an actual booty shaking mainstream song and I like it. There are times I honestly think Ms. Monáe is an evil genius, especially when she appears on interviews – as much as I love the heck out of her music & what she stands for – ol’ girl is one calculated strategist. She preempted the inevitable backlash with an interview before the song was released, and then with lyrics like “I ain’t got no worries, I’m my own private dancer”, “I’m too much of a rebel, never do what I’m supposed to”, “sometimes I’m peachy and sometimes I’m vulgar” and the crowning jewel “you cannot police me, so get off my areola” has basically turned it into a not-so gentle reminder that you shouldn’t ever put here in a box and has also given it a feminist edge to it. Janelle will not stand you telling her what to do.

Of course, the song has its faults – the production could have been better, we’ve heard stunning music from Janelle and her Wonderland Arts Society cohorts, but the production seems a bit lazy. It sounds like Jidenna’s Classic Man, plus the fact both songs share similar synths with Ludacris’ ‘How Low’ bugged me a bit. I’m like a dog with a bone, when I hear something that sounds similar to something I’ve heard, it’s worse when I can’t remember it – it will consume me… I’m still a bit so-so with Jidenna’s verse, it sounds nice, until I listen to it, then I’m like “oh boy you for do better now…” I still haven’t forgiven him for the toga line.

Fortunately, it hasn’t stopped me from listening to it on repeat on YouTube. It’s sticky, sexy & sweet, if this came from Rhianna, it would have been sticky & sexy, but we won’t have believed that it could be sweet.

Could someone please tell my body to stop attempting to dance, it’s really getting embarrassing. Oh and Nigerians, we’re everywhere, Jidenna is indeed of Nigerian descent. Did I just write a review? It appears I just did…

Get Another Boyband

This all started out innocently enough, I was minding my own buisness tumbling away on Tumblr, then all of sudden I started reblogging musical posts on *NSYNC. Then, I made the mistake of making a comment about Backstreet Boys in my tags…Then I lost about 2 hours, technically it was over 4 hours (that’s *NSYNC, BSB & Shania Twain), of my life.

I kinda forgot how much of a fan I was of BSB, they were my whole secondary school life, they released their debut single in 1995 and their first greatest hits in 2001. I was a student at an apparently prestigious (which means I grew to loathe it) secondary school, yes my big bad secret is…I was a Fowler girl (that’s Vivian Fowler Memorial College for Girls to the uninitiated) from 1995-2001. Yes, I’m a proper Fowler girl, I did the whole 6 years and the move from the original site to its current permanent location.

Anywho, as I tap this out I’m currently listening to BSB’s Black & Blue, it’s the one album of theirs I listened to as a teen, thanks to someone who had it in school, so if you remember your release dates or are handy with Wikipedia, this means this is one of the albums I listened to in my last year of secondary school. In fact, it’s the only album of theirs I’ve ever listened to.

You’ve no idea, how happy I was hearing The Answer to Our Life and my glee that I could still remember the lyrics after over a decade. Then I collectively lost all of what was left of my mind when I heard Get Another Boyfriend. Oh boy it was bad…of course I promptly repeated it, then during said repeat, Black & Blue mysteriously appeared on my phone. I may or may have not spent an hour listening to Get Another Boyfriend today…

Now, this album is made up of 11 other songs including the three singles – Shape of My Heart, The Call, More than That, but I don’t know why Get Another Boyfriend just does it for me, don’t know if it’s because it sounds musically similar to The Call, all I know BSB could always pull it off. And those guys can sing, just google Backstreet Boys and acapella or simply listen to More Than That. Maybe, that’s why I was never really bothered about One Direction, The Wanted, Union Jack, or whatever current boybands out there.

Now, I’ve no idea what BSB has been doing after Drowning came out, since they became a manband and my fickle heart wanted my cheesy boyband back, then I grew up. Yes, I know Kevin left then came back. Seriously, he and Howie were my favourites – I always pick the guys that usually get ignored, and Kevin Richardson is the only man I know whose eyebrows out rival Lee Pace’s.

Well thanks to my Tumblr adventure, I know they made an epic Harlem Shake video and they are doing some kind of cruise ship thing and an odd super-group thing with NKOTB (New Kids on the Block). The album just finished so I’ll end on that note.

 

Yes, I’m now listening to Get Another Boyfriend on repeat…

3 Songs

Day 3 of the writing 101, yes I skipped the first 2 days and I’m technically on the 4th, but it’s still Day 3 somewhere. The three most important songs to me? Mind is drawing a blank, so I’ll talk about the three  most played songs on my phone:

3. Walk of Shame by P!nk

“One step, two steps, counting tiles on the floor…” Now, I’ve never experienced the dreaded Walk of Shame, but I can still relate to it. This is one of those songs, that makes my body think it can dance. Many a time, I’ve done a jig, while crossing the road to this song. Don’t worry I looked both ways and was careful.

2. Dance Apocalyptic by Janelle Monáe

“Bambi make her dance apocalyptic now…” Another one that makes my body think it can dance. I was fortunate enough to see her live at Brixton last month, this little lady is an energetic ball of fire, good things do come in small packages.

1. Malang by Siddharth Mahadevan & Shilpa Rao

Anybody who follows the Dhoom series, will know this as the song from the Great Indian Circus scene in Dhoom 3. If I remember correctly, this was the first song I downloaded this year, then I proceeded to listen to it a lot. Fortunately, my phone does not announce the number of plays, I’m very happy it doesn’t because I know for a fact I listened to it at least 2 hours straight, it’s 4:33 long AND I’m listening to it right now. It’s in Hindi, I don’t speak a word of it, but it made sense when I watched it at the cinema (subtitles people) and I love it. Plus, I can sing it flawlessly.

 

Yippie, finally wrote something for the Blogging U…

More than Enough – Dubem

Since some people have been having issues downloading from SoundCloud especially through their mobiles/their inability to understand the highly visible Download button, I’ll be posting it directly to my blog. Scratch that apparently, I’ve to pay – sorry peeps, you better learn to understand that download button…

Anywho, on this track, produced by Willz, she’s singing about how the Lord is more than enough for her. Verdict: Definitely a grower, although I might have some issues with vocal effects – autotune, how I still hate you, might come off a tad bit overproduced, lyrically & vocally I can’t fault it – simple straight to the point with a lovely voice.

dubem

Get to Know Her Bit AKA Profile
Gospel crooner Dubem, born Chidubem Amanda Ikebuego, the fifth child in a family of six hails from Obosi in Idemili North Local Government Area of Anambra State.

Dubem’s childhood influences in music spurred her belief that a voice is one of the strongest musical instruments in the world. “My greatest asset is my voice. That is why I like people like Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey, Cece Winans, right from my childhood. But on the local level, I like Waje and a gospel artiste called Efe. Efe is so unique in her delivery and I am moved by what she does with her voice”.

Dubem started singing in church, but only embraced music professionally at the age of 12, due to the influence of her friends who kept reminding her that she was blessed with a gift: “I started with Tim Godfrey and the Xtreme Crew. It was at the age of 12 that I embraced music as a professional when my friends started urging me to do something with my voice. Before then, I was doing shows from one church to another; but in 2005, I met D’banj. His band had just been formed and they were looking for backup singers, so I was part of the original band. From there, I moved on to join Onyeka Onwenu and eventually I got back to Sammie Okposo, whom I have worked with on and off. I have spent eight years with Sammie”.

On working with Sammie Okposo: “Sammie is a unique artiste; that is why he is generally seen as the King of Gospel music in Nigeria and he deserves it. He is one very big force in this whole thing I am doing and a great influence in my career. Our rehearsals are like being in real concerts, Sammie has this attitude that hard work is the only way out and goes the extra mile to enforce it on everyone around him. He is also making sure that this album is completed in good time”.

The dynamic singer-songwriter is currently in the studio working on her upcoming debut album, she has already dropped three promotional singles – Ojija Nma, More than Enough and For Real – were jointly produced by Phat E and Williams. The versatile singer is breaking new grounds and exploring her musical dexterity.The singles come off with a touch of pop, dance, worship and afro-pop vibes are a product of her several years’ experience working at the background with some of Nigeria’s notable music artistes.

While, gospel music artistes seem over burdened with a lot of expectations in comparison with their secular music counterparts, Dubem says that is not a problem for her: “I have always coped with life on the two divides; I do not see it as a problem at all. When you have been in this job for this long, learning from the masters and watching them, you will build confidence to face the challenges that would come your way. That is one way I have handled this aspect of my career”.

Although, Dubem has completed her studies in Business Administration at the Lagos State University, LASU, she is still passionate about studying Mass Communication. She says this will help her galvanise all she has learnt so far in music. “The response to my music at concerts is great, but I am sure it would be better with these singles that are serenading the airwaves”, she stated optimistically.

Dubem’s electrifying voice will make you see how great God is. Be blessed and receive all you need as you listen!

My Chi – Ocean ft Vhicktoure Bass

Speaking of Ocean, just listened to her song “My Chi”, which she only recorded 6 days ago, yup that’s the 13th of March, 2013. In fact my ass is so fresh, I got it on the 15th. Anywho, it’s produced by Papa K, with Vhicktoure Bass on the bass. The song means My God, it’s sung in Igbo & English and yes I know what it means. And if you’re wondering, she did it in one take and it’s a freestyle, yup she bad like that…

You look so cute, so that's why the picture stays!

You look so cute, so that’s why the picture stays!

I just want to hug your cute ass, I call dibs – no one hugs you except me, capish?

You Don’t Even Get An Intro…

…No Drumroll.

I’m so happy for one of my fave YouTubers, VanJess, just noticed this on my facebook homepage, apparently they posted this 10 hours on fb – that’s the closest to freshness I’m ever going to get. Yes, these lovely singer-songwriting siblings have actually done a proper studio version & video of their song, Drumroll. Loving the Caribbean undertones. Sean Fury, this is how it’s done…

 

….Bum-Bi-Da-Bum-Bi-Da-Bum-Bum-Yeah.

I Predict a Repeat…

MKS – Mutya Keisha Siobhan aka Sugababes 1.0. Seriously, why?! Aren’t the original problems still there?? Yes, I know about good wine maturing with age, but we are human – you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. Will Keisha still allegedly be a bullying bitch? Will Siobhan still allegedly be a victim? Will Mutya still allegedly be a….I dunno, I just wanted to type allegedly again…

Oh well, here’s to hoping for some good music, maybe we’ll get some good Sugababes 1.0 vs. Sugababes 4.0 music. I was actually going to write some thought provoking stuff, but bugger it all, I kinda forgot…oops.

…so I Predict a Riot, Catfights & Spotlights style…or maybe, just maybe Kenzi’s version of Succubi fighting – “Slow motion pillow fights? Crotch lasers?”. Geez, I really miss Lost Girl.