Make Me Do a Double Take

Well, in my not so short time on this planet, I’ve heard (and said) some really questionable things, so in honour of that sentiment here are some lyrics that have made me do a double take…

  1. Would you risk it for a chocolate biscuit? – Frisky by Tinie Tempah. Dude seriously?! I won’t get frisky for a chocolate biscuit, I don’t care if that biscuit was dipped in the chocolatey goodness of Keith David’s voice. It ain’t happening, bruv. Oh and asking twice is not going to change the outcome.
  2. I lie awake, I’ve come to ground, I’m watching porn in my hotel dressing gown. – Destiny by Zero 7 ft. Sia. Yup, that’s how the song starts. I guess they were trying to set the tone.
  3. I came so hard from your mouth, I saw the future, it was dark – The Future by Austra. Wow, the lady appears to have skills. If someone ever tells you this, pat yourself on the back, then seek help since it appears your future might be bleak. Apparently, the future isn’t bright and/or orange. Remember to use your powers for good.
  4. I’ll fix your smashed up head. – You Know Where to Find Me by Imogen Heap. Wait what?! What the heck? I don’t recall the guy’s head being smashed anywhere in the song. When did the attack happen? Did you do the attacking?
  5. Goodnight and Go by Imogen Heap. The song really is about her stalking a guy. Look, the song sounded cheery enough, you know a woman suffering from a crush/unrequited love from an oblivious man, then the second verse happens…

Follow you home, you’ve got your headphones on and you’re dancing

Got lucky, beautiful shot you taking everything off watch the curtains wide open

Then you fall in the same routine flicking through the TV relaxed and reclining

And you think you’re alone…

Yup, that lost its cuteness real quick…

I know I could have filled this list with any random rap song, any popular Nigerian song or whatever weird stuff comes out from Kanye West’s or Lil’ Wayne’s mouth, I could have even attempted to translate Chief Keef’s mumble…but, where’s the fun in that?

Nice to know I can still write random content, and yes the title is from Missy Eliott’s Lose Control. Yes, I still use random lyrics as titles…Now maybe I’ll finally update my gaming blog.


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