All that untapped potential

No, I’m not talking about me, I’m talking about Nigeria. It dawned on me a couple of years ago, that there are so many business routes that Nigeria hasn’t taken.

Let’s see:

  • Tourism – With all those Rocks (e.g Olumo Rock), Waterfalls (e.g Erin-Ijesa/Erin-Ijesha waterfalls, u knw where d hot & cold water meet, that was cool), d slavery house/depots/snatch centrals, d museums (family actually went there once, those bullets holes in Murtala’s car were crazy), the Game Reserves (Yankari). All those excursions I took in Fowler (yes people, I was a VFMC girl, now get over it.) , they were good for something. To be sincere, I really don’t know much about Nigerian wild life, since I grew up in Lagos, but we sure as hell have loads of livestock. We have the Atlantic Ocean & absolutely no surfers (I blame those worshippers, who are always at the beach), there’s Takwa Bay. Anyhoo, I just mentioned those places from the top of my head, there are many more that I haven’t covered. We same to have loads of foreign immigrants (you should see the nautrialization section in the paper, it’s like a mini phone book) with the Lebanese as the highest foreign minority. Plus everything’s organic, except when you go to the posh supermarkets of course.
  • Movies – We are already the third largest film producing country. Movies are churned out faster than Paris Hilton’s brainwaves (bad analogy since anything’s faster than………). I’m still waiting for an addition to the Best Foreign Language Film at the Oscars. C’mon, I settle for the long list. There could seriously take their time and actually produce, edit the movie and actually have a big budget. We seriously need a big Harmattan movie (err.. people, we only have 2 seasons – Rainy & Dry/Harmattan seasons), honestly, I would be at the front line at the cinema. Maybe, more sci-fi, less supernatural, romance and drama. Remember,sometimes quality is better than quantity.
  • Comics: It’s no secret, that I’m a comic fiend. I’m an X-Woman, Wolverine, Storm & Rouge till I die. Anyhoo, the only Nigerian comics I know are the comic strips. It’s been a while since I read Captain Africa, a brillant detective who obviously wore tights. Adam & Eve, a comical take on the World’s first humans. Cain & Abel (for some absurd reason, I’m now having doubts about A&E. Ahh…my memory’s such a fickle creature). Then there was a strip about an independent woman – which actually ended during my time – that for the life of me, I cannot remember its/her name. Anyhoo, there are loads of talented Nigerian artists (an uncle & a cousin of mine are outter this world, who only draw as a hobby). Sidebar: I actually have an idea for a comic/graphic novel to pass the time, you could draw for me. **queue nice voice & begging** Apparently, we had our first Nigeria Comic-Con in 2004. The first comic book shop opened in 2006, Planet Comics in Kaduna (darn, I ain’t driving there!). Although, a lot of us have been reading comics longer than that. Plus, why am I never around?? Anyhoo, I’m kinda surprised there haven’t done a comic about Nigerian gods, Biafra, IBB, Abacha & the whole military regime, so much material. C’mon, Frederick Forsyth pratically gave you Ojukwu (the General) in The Dogs of War. Oh well, here’s to hoping.
  • Animation: The Nigerian animation industry is almost non-existant, even though there are probably Nigerian animators working in the animation industry. Hey, I could be very wrong, just found out they are going to be releasing the first Nigerian animated movie. Someone was actually paying attention, with a budget of 80 million naira (way smaller than most, but definately higher than your average nigerian movie). Anyhoo, it’s called Lifespan, a story of a royal clan of mosquitoes, situated in the Niger Delta region of Nigeria, over 4000 years ago, who are looking for a magical cure for ……wait for it……..malaria. They want to co-exisit with the human race, since they are tired of killing them. Unfortunately, that’s the only article, I’ve found and it’s a year old, but here’s to hoping.
  • Medicine: Being a country plagued by mosquitoes (yup, they just keep coming!), and being the Mother of Africa and all you’d expect, malaria to be a thing of the past. Although, I haven’t had malaria in 6 years now (since I became an International Student, they’ve kinda grown some prejudice. Apparently, they don’t like the junk food). Unfortunately, the medicine sector eludes me, since I’m chicken, when it comes to all things medicine-related. Let’s just say, I’m never donating blood, since I never complete my medication.
  • Business: Dangote is King, since he’s now officially the richest African and second richest black person in the world behind Mohammed Al Amoudi. Dude is richer than Oprah. Anyhoo, I don’t actually have the energy to go into this, cause it would be a very long essay and I have forgotten what I was going to type. It had something to do with crops, you know the whole organic angle. The whole fact that Nigeria used to make millions with palm oil, groundnuts and other what what-nots. Plus a whole lot of business babble, that I kinda zoned out on.
  • Music: The Nigerian music scene is thriving locally, but not internationally. Although, we throw some kick ass music festivals/concerts that bring the big cats. We still need to project ourselves to the international sector, where all the money’s at, since the big wig labels will only be distributing. All the old hands have a niche in the World Music (which i still say is over simplified) – Fela Kuti’s music lives on, Femi’s still a second and less crazy to his father, King Sunny Ade still rocking, Lagbaja still intrigues people. Where are the young’ns? Why should the [United States of] Americans be the only ones, who are famous locally and internationally. C’mon, there are two American continents, seriously. 2Face almost made it stateside, but Kennis Music/his manager did not captitalise it as much as they could have. Asa is making some waves in Europe, she was on Jools in April[?]. Look music is universal. Comment – Does she actually play the guitar? Cause she always has it on her televised performances, but she’s never actually playing it. There’s always this dude on the background doing the killer acoustics. Hmmm……she was also on Trevor Nelson’s Sessions. Okay young’ns sign up to Asa management now! Hope Agbaya’s music kick up a storm, but I can now safely say I know people in the Nigerian music industry. 4th republic and fastbreak music fan by association. Free advertising for you kiddies.

At the end of the it all boils down to leadership and management. With corrupt bastards (no offence to their children, but you know your pops are assholes, some of you even inherited their assholiness) scheming through to make their trillions (in naira, of course. If I decided to say it in pounds, you’d drop), all you tend to get is stagnation. So much for serving and protecting your country. Imagine, my dad got a phone call informing him that Lamidi Adedibu had died that morning, my dad replied "Thank God". After the call, he ponders for a minute, looks at me and says "How can you say "Thank God" and celebrate when someone has died?" I remind him that people were throwing parties, when Abacha died. With a sad look on his face, he repeats his question and then sighs.

wow, I didn’t use text/net speak, this must be serious. Now, I am going to watch Donna and Rose turning left.


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