Gosh I’m mean

I just watched d Halle Berry’s Oscar speech, gosh I laffed my ass off! The only person, who didn’t get d 45s/60s speech limit. It took over 5mins! The crying, took about a min or 2, d breaths btw d crying took anoda minute, d rest was d thank us. The audience were in tears, but that cud hv been gd acting. All I did was laff for 5mins – this is d bit where loads of ppl wil scream racism, I wonder how they wud react when they find out I’m Nigerian [gets them everytime]. Tilda Swinton’s speech cracked me up. Ari Sandle’s d King of Speechs, talk bout organised. Apparently all Master Smith cud say was "yeah". Damn I’ve a lecture in 20mins. If ur bored, u cud always watch d Oscars utube page. Oh well, I’m off to wash my hands, I dont think they’d like d frozen clementine smell. Oh & WTF happend 2 Diablo Cody??? I was expecting witty ditty not this. + she was bout 2 release d floodgates, then wit dat dress – then come out wit dat crazy shizzle?!

On a random & kinda related note, hindsight’s a bitch. U know d whole Eric Benét incident. Sometimes u wish u cud hv seen dat comin. Anoda comment, I think Tilda was takin d piss wit dat dress.

If I eva won an Oscar, I’d spend d 45/60s, sayin my customary "Oh boy", then d rest in silence, or I’d jump around like Cuba.

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