Ain’t I Funny?

Hello folks, since no one else will do it I will. This is the closest to vain & narcissistic, you’re ever going to get from me. Anywho, I like to think I’ve got a sense of humour. Sometimes it’s very had to find, since my default vocal setting is sarcastic & cynical, even when I’m complementing someone.

Since the batteries to my remote control have died, and I can’t find the AAA batteries, I’m stuck watching BBC1 with the annoying tennis highlights of Andy Murray & Roger Federer – it’s been going on for a long time, over 3 freaking hours! Oh well, you get a match in England, you get rain, everyone else gets highlights…

Weekly Photo Challenge: Fleeting. Dear Messrs Ben and Jerry

Why oh why, are your ice-cream confections, perfections?

Why oh why, can’t it ever last longer than 10 minutes?

10 minutes you ask, surely it takes longer to complete this task?

That’s how long it takes for your perfections to become extinctions.

An extinction, I will gladly commit again.

Oh crap, I see another tub, here we go again…

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For The Daily Post’s Weekly Photo Challenge, this week it’s Fleeting… Duh… Err… I needed a prompt, so I found one…

Damn you Ben & Jerry’s! And it’s not poetry, it just happened to rhyme…Why fleeting, err… I get a tub, a hand towel and a teaspoon, and I go HAM on it…You see fleeting…

Pet Peeves

This was going to be a proper post, but I can’t be frakked to type, so you’re left with my err…awesome… voice…Smile like you mean it folks, I command you to smile! This would have been up earlier, but the neighbours are really partying hard – that was on Saturday, I think the dude’s called Andrew, ’cause his Happy Birthday song kinda sucked, too many drunk folks – and my mic is fussy. Plus, I had some serious noise issues with my mic, finally sorted it out…

 

One day, I’ll spend more than 5 minutes constructing stuff, one day I shall write something freaking awesome…Till that day, you’re left with these…sorry… Oh and you should have seen how I freaked out with the blonde hair – I was all “eww…get it off me, my hand, oh my gawd, I going to die!”

Why I Shouldn’t Have Nice Things…

Been playing with my impulse buy & Audacity lately. Look, blame my cousin, Nene, for the weird ish I put up on YouTube today, sadly there’s more to come. I was minding my own business, when I recalled I hadn’t visited her blog in a while…

Well, it’s safe to say that I enjoyed the epicness, that was her blog post, so much – it brought out my inner wacko. So I decided to record some radio ads to the weird posters, since, Photoshop is not my friend…

As I was writing (ok, maybe trying to write) the spoof scripts, the weirdness happened, when I came across the Chukwudi poster. I kinda lost whatever sense of sanity I had left, and went total cray cray. Stopped writing, hopped on my mic and proceeded to make a total fool of myself….

Spoof Outtakes

Thanks to my lil’ sis, you won’t have any more spoof ads in Nigerian Pidgin English. Apparently, my pidgin really sucks now, damn you English accent! I will probably do the rest in a straight English accent. Although, I think I can still pull off an accented Yoruba English accent. Looks like my accented Igbo English needs some work…Wow, I’ve been in this country too long! Up next, Indiana Jona, whenever I finally stop laughing at the poster…

Kabalarian Philosophy Redux

I noticed someone read my original post, so I reread it. Oh, those lovely days when punctuation & caps where scarce…Anywho, KP’s still scamming their way into gullible marks’ hearts, it’s been just over 6 years and 5 months since my original post – It’s still BULLSHIT, just because they’ve got an app for that, doesn’t make it any less shitty. No sci-fi speak for this, just good old fashion swearing.

Spam’s Getting a Lil’ More Interesting

Thanks to my short bursts of creativity, I’ve been getting more hits on my blog, do a little dance, make a little love, get down tonight, get down tonight. Sorry about that. Anywho thanks to those bursts of weirdness, the spammernator’s back.

I’ll leave you with the strangest one I’ve received, err…it had bridemaids in it and it’s in Korean. Oh, this was originally attached to Alive Again. So when life kills you, then brings you back to life, always remember – stay a bridesmaid…

 

Nice to know trolls still exist, and they don’t only live in my head…

Turned Me into a Gutless Wonder…

I’ve had this title saved since the 11th, and for the life of me I couldn’t think about anything fitting for this. Maybe talk about, gravity keeping my head down, or maybe is it shame… you know use the lyrics to talk about something meaningful. But, TA-DA! You get this instead. Is it a plane? Is it superman? No. My 2TB external hard drive has died.

Quote of the Week

Sweet Minty Jebus, I’ve been laughing at this for like 10 minutes. Yes 10 actual minutes… This gem is brought to you by 4chan.

If Nicki Minaj and Lil Wayne were both drowning, and you only had time to save one, what kind of sandwich would you make?

Huh, they posted it during my IET graduates programme presentation…Anywho, I’d make a soft cheese and salmon bagel…Yeah, I’m posh like that! **Does that weird finger snap/whipping thing the kiddies do**

Monday Morning

OK, was reading the Monday Blog Hop, to be honest I kinda hate every weekday except Wednesday, dunno…maybe ’cause I was born on a Wednesday or ’cause a volcano erupted and killed a lot of people on my birth. OK maybe it wasn’t the exact time, with the different time zones & all, but a gal can have a morbid fascination…

5 Things I’ve Learnt from Playing God of War

I’ve never had a favourite anything, but God of War is definitely without a doubt my favourite hack and slash video game. This PlayStation exclusive has a special place in my devious heart. Apparently, I get rather passionate about it – something involving bloodlust, a diabolical grin and a manic presentation – complete with hand gestures & sound effects.

Frak, my…err…ex-boyfriend…it’s weird…once pointed out that I sound really crazy happy & even sexy, when I’m talking about this game series. Look, I don’t do sexy, I do scary, apparently once in a while sounds sexy. They were right, I might need help…